Random, Non-Detox Thoughts

Feeling sorta random today.  Usually like to write with some attention to reader interest and correct syntax, but not today.  Blog will probably read like a personal diary instead, but don't worry, I have nothing murderous to confess.  And I promise not to talk about depression, because it apparently scares people.  So does being blunt.  :)

Having some end of summer lazy days, well, for the most part. My last days of summer I have purposely designed to be this way.  No outside commitments if I can help it, and all of my work is self-directed and self-motivated, from home.  Not that, honestly, most of my life isn't structured this way anyway, but these last few weeks  before school starts I have been more intentional than ever about it.  All too soon I will be ruled by school schedules and twice or four times daily pickups/drop offs.  I like the regularity of it, essentially, but it is nice to also to have time off from it. So, I'm cleaning more, and getting the house organized for school.  These are really pleasant tasks, and I relish the time I have to spend on this, and take great pride in making it all work. 

The small things in life have always held a dear place in my heart - a cup of tea, kids playing happily at my feet, soothing little "owies," a stroll down the street, a bike ride with kiddos, etc.  A lot of these things are of course interrupted by little arguments and frustrations, and sometimes outright cat fights, not to mention pee accidents and demonstrations of the inability to listen when I'm talking. But whatev.  These incidents all serve as opportunities for me to "mold" my kids, teaching them those important lessons of how to share and get along with others, to tell the truth, to acquire patience.  These are so important!  There is a joy to be able to transfer these things on to four, precious souls.  It is overwhelming at the same time, but in my teaching I become more patient myself.  Everything you need to know about how to live you can learn from you kids, I believe.  If you want to learn to not act out impatiently, try teaching a 7 year with the same tendencies not to.  We are both growing - I can gaurantee it.  If you want to learn how to juggle a roomful of several different personalities, try juggling four kids 7 and under with 4 distinct temperaments and age - appropriate needs.  My goal in life is not to have a career, but when I do work outside the home again, what I have learned here is the basic human understanding of how people work.  I find that all of my volunteer work and curriculum writing is less of a challenge than my four stinkers.  Vastly different, but more manageable because of my boot camp.  I can't imagine the heartache of being away from their love and progress all day, and am grateful that I have learned the skills to manage a home in a way that saves us money enough to do this. 

On another note, I think my haircut from yesterday is too short.  I really really got excited at first, and still am, when I felt that weight fall off my head!  And it will grow, I think I'm just having a mourning period.  My hairdresser is going on maternity leave so I wanted to do something drastic before she left.  Well, I did.  Looks good, but feels so strange right now!

Last night we headed off as a fam to a kid birthday party.  I swear that it was summer when I went inside to change for leaving.  When I came out, it was fall.  I went back inside and changed to pants and grabbed my raincoat!  So I hang on to these "lazy" days of summer, heading to the beach even though I feel  beached out, and putting the sprinkler on for the kids.  It's my last summer to have a 7 year old, a 5 year old, an almost 4 year old, and a 2 year old, and these days won't last...